There is a sweet little Baptist church down the road from us and they were out doing visitation in our neighborhood a few weekends ago.  We opened the door to see this sweet, cheerful, old country man standing at our door.  He had the demeanor of a used car salesman, but with sincerity and a genuineness.  We chatted for a few minutes about church and God’s goodness.  Nathan mentioned that it is just the two of us for now but that we will be beginning our family soon (by God’s grace!).  Preacher Cooke quoted ps. 127 (specifically 3-5) to us:

¹Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
²It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep.
³Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
⁴As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.
⁵Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

Then he proceeded to tell us a story about the arrows are as the children of your youth and some may miss the mark, but the more you have, the better chances you’ll have of making the mark or something like that.  One lady in his congregation believes she doesn’t need many arrows b/c she has an atomic bomb on her hands!!  :)  I thought that was an excellent story!  Hahah.  :)

Then I was reading the other night and the first portion of that chapter caught  my attention.  Staying up  late and waking up early is nothing unless God is in it.  I have been quite proud of the fact that I wake up early with nathan and stay on his sleep schedule, even though I am not at a regular job.  This verse fixed that for me real quick!  :)  God gives his beloved sleep.  :)  Sweet sleep.  My friend.  :) But I do know that Prov. says not to sleep the days away, which I interpret to mean naps.  Especially naps like the ones I take!!!

But not only did my studies confirm the value of that chapter to our lives, but I just bought a book about Supernatural Childbirth and the first verse was, of course, quoted from this chapter.  Since reading the passage in the book, I have come across it at least 2 more times, even if it’s just a glance in the concordance or whatnot.  I am learning about the good things God has planned for us in this time.  Good sleep, God’s protection, a fruitful womb (which I have been concerned about since 17 years old).  I am learning that children are an heritage.  Heritage.  and the fruit of the womb is His reward.  they are an heritage and a reward.  just lately i have been anticipating that they will be a chore and another person to help deal with the messes that come with life.  we already have enough messes around here with just nathan and I.  but add more messes and troubles.  whwew.  but, God says they are a reward and an heritage.

It’s not much, fairly plain and simple, but it’s what I’ve been meditating on lately.

What Should I Include in My Prayer Journal

* Things that God has taught you

* Verses that apply to the situations in your life.

* Bible study notes.

* Word study notes.

* Definitions.

* Sermon notes.

* Confessions.

* Goals, dreams and desires that God has placed in your heart.

* Prayer requests.

* Answered prayers.

So, while I can put all this cool stuff in here, I am hoping that I will still come here to record monumental events in our life like the one I missed last week: our first time to try out our reel mower. We all stood around and watched like families in the 1950s while Nathan drove around the yard (without a shirt on, mind you) spitting grass all around. It was a great time. Now we have a bald yard and Nathan has a terrible sunburn. Later we found out that we get to have Nathan’s family’s self-propelled Snapper mower. Sweet!

So, I have wanted to be a stay at home mom since I was a teenager (but not until then!).  I believe children who are raised by their own parents, not the babysitters or teachers, grow up to be stronger and have a deep foundation.  I grew up in country public schools, which I believe are better at raising good kids than metro schools.  But even then, my mom was home when I came home from school for a good part of my upbringing.  I think that has helped make me who I am today.  That, and her sitting me in front of Sesame Street.  Go ABC’s!  and Number of the day!    But back to the original subject.  I want to stay at home with our kids.  And when we have kids, it will be socially acceptable for me to stay at home because of the mommie calling to raise babies into awesome kids and young adults.  But for now I am just playing with stuff in boxes and lots of  packing paper.  It feels a little bit wierd not contributing anything to the household.  No complaining about the workload here, though!  I worked HARD for the last 2 years and feel like I accomplished a ton, but there is something to be said about not having a reason to go to professional meetings or marketing events.  Not to say that I liked it, but I had somewhere I belonged.  Now I don’t belong.  I don’t belong at networking events, or mommie gatherings, or school, or work.  I need to find somewhere to get connected.  Wonder if anyone else has ever been in the same situation with the same feelings?

Hopefully by this time next year I will be a thriving photographer with a sweet website and blog and will be bringing in $ to go on vacations with or dates or to buy turkeys to give away at thanksgiving.    Oh the dreams we have!

The house was still available and we immediately got excited!  Actually, when she called to give us the good news, we were actually talking about what to do if she did call back with good news.  Then she gave us the even better news:  the coupon was still good!  If/when this deal goes through, it will be the biggest coupon I have EVER REDEEMED!!!!

God woke me up that morning and wanted to have a little talk.  Earlier in the week I was reading through a passage about a group of Israelites returning to Jerusalem.  They were fasting for the safety of themselves, their ‘little ones’, and possessions.  If that’s not the situation I am in, I don’t know what else is.  The only thing was that we are running ragged and need all the nutrition we can get.  And we can’t fast tv/computer time b/c we dont have tv/computer time.  And we can’t fast work, either. So we decided we would dedicate our free time to seeking God.  And we did.  And then God sent me to a passage saying the season of fasting is over. It’s time to feast and celebrate!  Feast and celebrate = PAAARTY!  And that was the morning before we headed out to find our new house.  Praise the Lord!  Miracles for the weekend:

1)  It was listed online at 150,000 so no one knew it was really 135,000.

2)  We found a number that actually worked hidden away in the window.

3)  There were no offers on the table at the time we submitted ours.

4)  The house/neighborhood is more than we could have ever dreamed complete with:

1-2-10 Warranty on the home

Pest prevention things

4 bedrooms 2.5 baths

corian countertops

2 attics

private woods behind the house

lazy river, camping areas, olympic size pool, tons of tennis courts, 8 miles of trails, cool gazebo with fireplace and lookout with a view in amenity center, conservation Areas

It’s amazing!  More than we could have ever wanted!!  It’s in the country a little bit but close enough to get to good shopping places.  Good school districts.  Good demographics.  Great paint.  Okay commute.  God is good to us!

So, the outsider thinks a condo is a good choice for us.  It looks like it would be a great choice, but I have alternative motives.  I think I would rather have a house in a not amazing neighborhood than have an apartment type place where I have no control over the infrastructure or yard.  I want to grow a garden.  I want to have dirt to play in and a yard for our dog and kids.  I don’t want to have to pick up poop or drive to a park for my kids to play outside.  And you never know how long you will have to stay in a place, and I’m just not comfortable making a commitment like that.  I did find a really cute couple of condos, though and I think they might be okay as investment-type properties.  One is in an old school.  How cool is that?!!

But a real house with a real yard where I can build a screened in porch if I want to sounds cooler to me.  :)  On a lighter note, it is cold outside, even in florida.  Yay!  We have on our sweatshirts with the doors and windows open.  It’s a strange time for us.  We have had a great weekend working and taking care of things.  This is our last normal weekend for a long while.  We will be living from a suitcase every weekend from now until we either close on a house or give up and rent.  I am so excited about going home.  :)  And having a little bit of time for myself.  It would be great to get a job and have a solid income, but I want to build a business.  Either photography or web design or something.  So that I can stay home with the kiddies when it’s time.  And what better opportunity to build something like that than now. But I will continue to look for a job and maybe I’ll need to go work at michaels or lowes or something and learn something productive that will help me later on.  :)  We’ll see.  I might be ready to do my thing now.  And I am sure God has something exciting lined up for me that is great for me.  I just hope everyone else understands in the event that what He has planned for me is not a full time position.  But, if I am in His ways, who cares what the rest of them think!

Oh, the things to think about and consider in these topsy turvy times.  But we are happy.  And we love each other and our pets.  And I think we are doing things the right way.  But it is hard, let me tell you.  Hard emotionally, financially, hard with discernment and wisdom needs.  Whwew.  Lord, get us through this!!

looking at him that keep me on the right path and looking to Him for my direction and guidance.  He’s got all the answers.  Not the supervisors or the regional team or even the president of the company.  If He be for me who can be against me?

I am sure the high drama parts of the story will benefit those people with little faith.  But to me, the most important result of this entire situation has been the renewal of my faith in my God who is alive and well.  When we get so wrapped up in our own meaningless lives, we forget who is in charge and what really matters.  This has certainly refocused my attention to His power and mightiness.  He’s not just who we sing about, he is the song.  He is the breath we breathe and the life we live.  And to beat all, He wants the best for us.

I was driving in my car the other day and a thought crossed my mind.  God is great and he answers prayer.  And he wants the best for us and doesn’t want us to suffer.  But then I thought:  who am I that He should hear me?  Who am I that the God of the universe that created our world, should even hear my cry!  Much less, RESPOND!  He certainly doesn’t have to respond to our request.  But He does.  Because He is love.  And it’s amazing that He would do all of this (set up our situation perfectly, getting everyone in the right mindset, and all the people in the right place, and create a perfect schedule of His timing to make the entire situation smooth as butter) because we are ‘suffering.’  Our situation just shows the mercy of God.

I have experienced His grace and it has been a theme ribboned through the last 10 years of my life, but mercy is a different animal, I am learning.  Mercy is what comes when you don’t have anywhere else to turn and He makes a way.  Grace is what gets you through the storm. Mercy is what gets you out of the storm.  I need to look into that a little more technically, but this is all new, whatever it is called.  I saw something in one of my readings the other day that said

¹³There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

And I always read that to say, God will not send you into a situation you can’t handle.  But this time I saw the second half of the verse.  That he will also make a way to escape!  And all those people said you have to go through the storm.  That God won’t give you a way out!  I know sometimes that’s not the way out, but sometimes (like me today) he sees that you are about to lose some of your footing and sends in a rescue boat to get you back on track.  And I am thankful for that.  :)  And I am happy that I am back on track with Him.  And I hope that from these times on that He sends a rescue boat to keep me on track.

Now, I know they don’t actually stitch their quilts by hand and they do have restaurants there, but it is a place to slow down and watch the sun rise in your flannel pajama bottoms and thick fluffy socks.  We had one of the best vacations to Gatlinburg last fall and since that trip, I have longed for another long weekend like that one.  We vacationed the right way.  Flew to K-ville.  Rented a sweet crossover.  Stopped by Kroger to pick up some necessities like pancakes, Oreos and milk, apples, Sargento chipotle cheddar cheese sticks, Wheat Thins and apple juice.

We packed our cameras and snacks and went for  day trips to the State Parks including Cades Cove.  It was amazing.  When the park opened, there was still dew on the ground and it was so cold, I kept shivering and shaking my camera.  Nathan almost got close enough to touch a Black Deer and we had a great time listening to the holler songs on a CD we picked up at the park.

By 9 am we were ready to shed our jackets (but not scarves for fashion reasons, of course) and explore the churches and settlement areas of Cades Cove, including sampling some amazing Apple Butter which we later purchased online for Christmas gifts.  It was perfect.  I long for that day.

Some other highlights of the trip were our fabulous cabin, falling asleep while watching the GA/FL game that Saturday, pancakes in the morning, and roasting marshmallows in the fire place with my mom and little brother (who came up for the last day or so of our trip), and the tragedy of the trip:  Nathan being stung by a dead wasp on the floor.

The wasps would come in during the daytime and fly around the loft part of the ceiling and climb on the windows.  Typical for a cabin, I suppose.  Then by nighttime, once they got tired, they would fall down and die on the floor.  They never came after us to sting us, but Nathan did step on one and the stinger got stuck in his foot.  We got the aftermath on tape.  It was dramatic.

Regardless of the tragedy, I long to feel the clean, crisp air in my lungs, the hot cup of hot chocolate in my freezing hands, the need to wear a coat and scarf, and the phenomenon of seeing your very own breath.  And the rustle of leaves being kicked around beneath your feet.  And the music.  I cannot describe, and you cannot imagine, the ‘music’ we listened to.  I would not call it bluegrass.

You can only call it ‘country.’  But how nice it was.

an inspiration for the little things in our life...

I haven’t heard anything from the people I’ve contacted about jobs, but I am not discouraged.  I know God has a plan for our cars, house, animals and my job.  And Nathan’s job and peacefulness.  I wish there were more minutes in the day to do the things I love and want to do.  But for now I have to settle with a few extra minutes to record my life.  Like Marley and Me.  :)  Except, not quite so public (fortunately).

So much is up in the air right know it is easy to be shaken, but it is good to wait and be patient.  And that is the best thing we can do right now.  And look forward to seeing each other again .  And I can’t wait to sleep with my head on his chest and smell his cologne and feel his hair.  It’s the little things that count.  That you miss.  I am grateful to have a Mr. Wonderful.  And I’m glad to spend these trying times with him at my side.  :)  If anyone has ever doubted, it is good to be married to your best friend.  It makes marriage everything it should be.

And, I’m still singing….  He’s got the whooooole wooooooorld in His hands…….

We are so thankful for His mercy and grace in this time in our life.  Theme song of the month:  He’s go the whoole woooorrrrrllddd in His hands. . .